There once was a time where I wish I would not breathe

I went as far as even trying to leave

My soul, my body, this entire reality

I always knew it just wasnt meant for me

It seemed so very simple, people do it everyday

I took it upon myself, I decided I couldn’t stay

Self asphyxiation felt like such a simple way

Til I passed out, failed yet I pushed through all the way

I wish I had known that my plan wouldn’t work

I would’ve done it better, wasnt worried about the hurt

A plethora of ways, so many things I could have tried

My own method ruined my goal, I got self denied

Though alive through it all, I cant say i am living

Ever since then, ive never really felt like i am winning

Going through the motions but I dont feel intact

Infact my mind always seems to wonder back

Back to the day where i tried to throw it all away

Trying still to figure out why on Earth do I stay

Not much hope, nor any good, got no reason I say

Yet regardless I yearn for better days